From the Notebook: a conversation

—You believe that words can give you peace?
—Is that a scoff?
—It’s a bit ridiculous.
—You’ve never tried to calm someone with words?
—But that peace is so temporary. Another circumstance will come along, another external war, that upsets the peace within.
—What if I consoled someone with words that remained true in all circumstances.
—Fine. Suppose he knew this to be the case also. That would not stop him from forgetting it in the midst of troubles.
—So, is there some force that could work against forgetfulness?
—If so, what would it be called? Not memory, that would beg the question.
—No, you’re right. Let’s call it “faith.”
—Okay.
—Now, if my words are met with faith in the anxious person, he could have peace so long as he has faith in my speech, which means that he does not forget the words that keep their peace-giving power in all circumstances.
—Now, don’t forget what I said about him knowing it to be the case….

From the Notebook: scattered thoughts about Isaiah 6

When Isaiah was watching Uzziah die, he saw the King of kings on his throne.  The temporal king was weak.  The eternal king is always in power.  This changed Isaiah’s life and altered his whole worldview.

When Isaiah saw the Lord on his high throne, he did not calmly reflect on his own imperfections.  He felt crushed under the weight of glory.  He was sure that dissolution of his being was imminent.  He became anxious about nonbeing.  He did not celebrate God’s holiness.  He despaired at his wretchedness.

Isaiah noted his unclean lips.  It is Isaiah’s lips that God will use most powerfully in his ministry.  Where are you conscious of sin?  Your sin is forgiven in Christ.  Now expect that God will take that part of you to do his greatest works.

A Lyrical Sidenote

I’ve been spending a lot of time listening to some of my favorite musicians and singers, more than usual.  Jason Upton, Jon Foreman, and Josh Garrels I played and replayed on my laptop when visiting family in New York over the winter break.  Each brings something different to the table, but all of them share an outpouring of the heart immersed in things from above.  One matter particularly meaningful to me in this season is a musician’s willingness to express anxieties.  More on that later.

And I said, please
Don’t talk about the end
Don’t talk about how
Every living thing goes away
She said, friend
All along
Thought I was learning how to take
How to bend not how to break
How to live not how to cry
But really I’ve been learning how to die
I’ve been learning how to die

—Jon Foreman, “Learning How to Die”

Everyone says that it’s alright
Living in darkness every night
But I think it’s time, Lord it’s time
I’m ready to give up all my sin
But I don’t know where to begin
And I think it’s time to find out
And make that change

—Josh Garrels, “Decision”

How much time will I keep wasting?
How much cheap wine will I keep tasting?
Been to church and now I’m back again
Tired of living for the pride of men
And the world may think I’m crazy when I don’t run with them
But it’s just plain idolatry when God can’t have all of me

—Jason Upton,“Will of God”

I’m not sure why it always goes downhill
Why broken cisterns never could stay filled
I’ve spent ten years singing gravity away
But the water keeps on falling from the sky
And here tonight while the stars are blacking out
With every hope and dream I’ve ever had in doubt
I’ve spent ten years trying to sing these doubts away
But the water keeps on falling from my eyes

—Jon Foreman, “The Cure for Pain”

Will a man find a home
If he walks the world alone?
Searching for a promised land
Another day, walk and wait
For this choice to end in fate
Searching for life among the dead
Once I held you near, and words were clear
My hands rested upon your heart
Now by night and flame I call your name
My love, when will an answer be found?

—Josh Garrels, “My Child”

And if I were really honest
And the truth were known
It may sound a little funny
This is what my prayer would be:
I don’t know what to do
But my eyes are on you
I don’t know what to do
But my eyes are on you

—Jason Upton “Gideon”